Number 2!

We've finally decided to add to our family - but we can't take this decision lightly.

Arianna's first year was VERY VERY hard on us (me more than my husband) and we don't want another preemie. I've learned alot about the long term affects of prematurity in the last year. I've learned about gestation viability and all the various medical terminology that goes with it - you know, stuff that a normal pregnant woman wouldn't have to know...

Based on my first pregnancy and my possible cervical insufficiency I want a preventative cerclage. It involves 'sewing' my cervix shut to prevent pre-term labor/birth. When I first saw my OB at my 6 week post-delivery appointment she inserted the Mirena IUD I wanted and I asked her if they knew of any reason why Arianna arrived early. She said no but next time I would get 17P shots and would be watched more closely. I asked about a cerclage and she told me that I was in pre-term labor and didn't need one.

The research I have done in the last few months does not lead me to believe that is the case. I pretty much painlessly dialated and didn't feel any real pain until I was already 4 cm! That's scary! The research I've done says a cerclage can do more good than harm in cases like mine and I want to be sure that EVERYTHING possible is done to avoid having another preemie.

So I have a pre-conception appointment on Tuesday during which I will bring all the studies I can dig up supporting my cerclage request and hope to get a referral to a perinatologist for a pre-conception appointment soon after. I have my yearly pap smear on October 25th and will have my IUD taken out at that point.

Then its party time!

Just Begining

Hello! Welcome!

I'm starting this blog to document my first pregnancy 'after preemie'.

My first pregnancy began around the 1st of September 2005 - very unexpectantly! I was using the Ortho Evra birth control patch and apparantly it doesn't work so well because I got pregnant! I was not happy about it. At the time I was a skydiver and being pregnant and jumping out of planes don't mix - it was going to ruin my fun! I spent the majority of my first trimester in a depressive fog - crying alot and sulking in the bedroom watching TV (something I never do!).

After week 13 or so I started to come around. I assumed everything was going fine - the doctor appointments I had indicated nothing different. I had minimal morning sickness and nothing to complain about.

I am a preemie - I was born at 30 weeks in 1978. My grandmother had many second trimester losses and took the miscarriage drug DES - this is why we believe my mother had both my brother and I too early. When I was 18 I went through 16 months of bad pap smear after bad pap smear... I ended up having a LEEP procedure and 2 cone biopsies. Difficulty in pregnancy was mentioned as a possibility, but who thinks of that at 18?

I told my OB group about this familial connection and my possible cervical insufficiency and the first doctor I saw said I would get weekly ultrasounds until week 20. The second doctor I saw - the next week - said everything look good you don't need anything until week 20 (biophysical ultrasound).

At our 20 week ultrasound (just after Christmas) we found out we'd be expecting a girl! My husband was so excited, I was too (although secretly hoping for a boy, shh!).

Everything progressed fine.

At 28 weeks 2 days I went to a wholesale club near our house to buy cases of water. I couldn't find anyone to help me lift them, so I did it myself - two big cases of water into the cart. My back hurt for a while after that!

The next day I was volunteering to help at the local cat show - which involved being on my feet alot. My mother came to the show at noon and offered to take me to a local restaurant for lunch. While in the restroom at the restaurant I noticed I had an unusual amount of discharge - I chaulked it up to 'pregnancy goop' and went back to the table and casually mentioned it to my mom, who didn't seem concerned either. She then offered to take me to the maternity clothing store to buy my first maternity outfit. I was so excited. I was 7 months and was starting to need them now.

I found a nice outfit which my mom purchased and then we went back to her car. We were going back to our apartment so I could show her the baby's room we had just finished 3 days earlier. While sitting in her car I noticed my back was really hurting. It had actually been nagging me since the night before, at the wholesale club.

We got back to the house and I was sitting in the rocker in the baby's room when the pain started to come in waves. I commented how pulling a muscle in your back really hurts and I was going to lay down on a heating pad. My mom left and my husband and I laid down on the bed to talk about my day. While we were talking I noticed my stomach was making wierd positions with each wave of 'back pain'. I knew this wasn't normal and called my OB office and got the OB on call. She told me to go to the ER and she would meet me there, saying "It's probably JUST contractions"...

We get to the ER and find out that I'm fully effaced and already 4 cm. I was amazingly calm though - I thought she'd be ok since I was also a preemie. I was wheeled up to L&D floor and thats when the pain REALLY started. I was quickly given an epideral and steroid shots and would stay on my back for the next 38 hours...

Arianna Frances was born at 6:43 AM on March 13th, 2006. She weight 2 lbs. 15 oz. and was 15" long. She didn't come out screaming... and I was so exhausted the nurses had to lift my head for me to see her. I heard her cry after they got her into the adjourning room to clean her up. My husband said he watched as they put her into an incubator and the nurse wheeled her down the hall to the NICU "like she was wheeling a ham at the grocery store"...

I don't remember what happened after that except that they stitched up my episiotomy (yes, a 3 lb. baby got me an episiotomy), got me some food and eventually wheeled me, gurney and all to the NICU to see my tiny baby girl.

fter 6 long long long weeks in the NICU she came home - only to go to the PICU with breathing problems a week later... Her first year was riddled with many prematurity related issues and we're very very very scared to try again...

But every day I see my girl my heart aches for what could have been - for a normal pregnancy - and for the baby that has now grown into a toddler. I miss a baby and really am ready to try again - with the hope that this one will be a healthy, full term baby!